Newsletter 2005/06

Since 2003/04 the club has produced weekly match reports. From the start of the 2005/06 season this became a weekly newsletter, distributed during the season, containing match reports from each of the games played that weekend as well as other key information and a selection of adverts and offers.

Mon 31-Oct-05

Issue 05

Events have been somewhat overtaken by time, but that's no reason not to document another topsy-turvy weekend for THD. Match reports below from the weekend of 22-23 October start off with the Men's 3s - partly because they won and partly to ensure those with ADS aren't defeated by Dave Hancock's novella straight up. Plough on for an eloquent account of the Men's 1s trip to Fareham. The Tornados and the Dragons won too, but a first loss of the season for the Diamonds and a battering for the Royals prove that it's not all in a name. Of the women's sides, only the 3s stepped onto an astro in anger to share the points with Reigate, though the 4s fed their recent taste for victory in a friendly with a little help from others resting from the rigours of the leagues.

Administratively, there are still a few outstanding subs to come in. Details on subs including new standing order forms are at www.thehockeyclub.co.uk (see About Us, Fees). No pay, no play so get your forms or cheques to your captains or EJ now. But to help our diminutive Treasurer out, if you do have any questions about subs, please contact respective club captains, Jo Malkin (women@thehockeyclub.co.uk) and Aidan Brock (men@thehockeyclub.co.uk) in the first instance.

Help is also needed at Dulwich Sports Club on firework night on Saturday 5 November. Any volunteers for fire marshall duty should contact Chris Richman - on chris.richman@gmail.com - as soon as possible.

reports by: James Terrett, Mark Jones, Graeme Evans, Chris Richman, Stacey Sellman, Claire Whitehead and Dave Hancock.

Men's 3s vs. Oxford University 3s: Won 3-1

With many absentees this week, the 3s had to sub in some of the 2s and I ended up in goal. It had all the makings of a disaster. We were, however, the Mutt's Nuts. Keeping it simple was the mantra, and it meant we created chance after chance but we just couldn't convert. Mike Killen stole in a rebound to ensure we went to half-time 1-0 up and with a superb defensive display from the back four, I hardly had much to do apart from sweat in the stinking keeper's kit and shout "Keep it simple" every 4 seconds. After the break we started well with Nick Jacob bundling in a goal allegedly coming off his stick, but it didn't. At 2-0 up we had a little wobble and Oxford scored a good break-away goal leaving us with 10 minutes to survive. We then kept the ball, put in plenty of effort and were duly awarded when Fergus Jagger momentarily enchanted the opposition with one of his "looks" (I think it was Blue Steel), and the Face of Dulwich struck a short corner into the corner of the goal. Banners produced an awesome display and won MOTM Golden Pint with close competition from Nick's girlfriend.

A night out in Oxford followed, where entertainment came in the form of Graeme Lyness. Its difficult to describe what Graeme brings to an evening, but we all feel a little better educated on Northern Ireland (It is in the UK Alex) and the mental image of him staggering round a dodgy nightclub with two buckets of champagne calling everyone "wee man" will live long in the memory. Go Ulster. (JT)

Team: James Terrett, Alex Brown, Fergus Jagger, Matt Groom, Graeme Lyness, Mike Killen, Chris Coleman, Richard Banwell, Carl Hagger, Nick Jacob, Lee Snowden.

Scorers: Mike Killen, Nick Jacob, Fergus Jagger.

Next match: Saturday 5th November vs. Southgate 3s - away

Tornados vs. Wayfarers Heavies: Won 1-0

Pepper, beef, coffee & Saturday's result... all needed to be ground out with skill and determination. Fortunately the Tornados were more focused than the Hubble telescope. A match that looked flat and two-dimensional on paper came to life at Fortress Dulwich. With a siege mentality that the Alamo would have been proud of the Reds stuck to the task like a small boy with a tube of copydex. Hatches were battoned, belts were tightened and stakes sharpened. A line was drawn in the sand and Wayfarers couldn't cross it. As the last few minutes of the game slipped away like prostitute with a fist full of cash while the pressure increased like fat guy sitting on a balsa wood chair... except this chair didn't break. As the final whistle was blown a cheer erupted like an acne-ridden teenager's face... 1-0. "How dya like them apples?" (MJ)

Team: Lee Tearle (GK & MOTM), MJ, Nick Thomson, Tom Alexander, Rolly Ferneaux, Robby Layton, Si Wilshire, Dougal Davis, Nick Harris, James Perrott, Nick Jones, Dan Hopkins, Loz Mockery & Geoff Pritchard.

Scorer: Geoff Pritchard

Umpire: Si Newell

Coach: Si Riley

Diamonds vs. Hampstead & Westminster Spaniards: Lost 1-2

So, the Diamonds' winning run didn't last forever. Another ten minutes or a couple of extra short corners and the story may have been different, but aside from the scoreline there was still plenty to cheer in this entertaining top-of-the-table clash. Given too much space early on, a skilful looking Hampstead team dominated the first half and went two up, both from shorts. But having struck a post just before the break, the second half saw us set up camp in the opposition's last third. A powerful run from midfielder Rob Giret enabled striker Tim Harris to have the last laugh in his running feud with the Hampstead goalie, but the equaliser proved elusive, even though Oliver Walton went close and a couple of well-worked short corners merited a goal, if only for artistic merit. (GE)

Team: Paul Reid, Graeme Evans, Richard Batty, Tom Chicken, Rob Giret, Warren Holme, Simon Canter, Nick Hart, Tim Harris, Dominic Peyton, Oliver Walton, Billy Dowie, Will Morgan, Paul Burrows.

Scorer: Tim Harris

Next match: Saturday 29th October vs. PHC Chiswick - Dulwich College 3.30 pm

THD Royals vs. Wimbledon Badgers: Lost 1-8

Beat-en (adj) - To defeat or subdue, as in a contest

Thrash - To utterly defeat, vanquish

Hammered - To defeat soundly. To inflict a heavy loss

Bat-tered - To subject to repeated beatings

And so dear reader says Dictionary.com. There are of course countless other words we could use here, for example humped, stuffed, and walloped. This was the heaviest defeat I have been involved in at THD. I don't want it to happen again. If there are any positives to be taken from this then they were a very good side - by my reckoning King's Grammer School first XI - and we did also have quite a few chances to pull a few back. And finally that I don't think it is possible to have that unbalanced a side again. (CR)

Team: Lee Tearle, Will Pendrill, Ferg Johnson, Andy Bond, Neill Eggins, Mark Jones, Mark Annear, Kim Keats, Oliver Blaydon, Oliver De La Fosse, Ed Allen, Richard Mead, Andy Bond and myself.

Scorer: Does it really matter?

Women's 3s vs. Reigate: Drew 1-1

During the first 20 minutes we had all the possession and deserved a goal. But unfortunately, it was they who scored from a breakaway goal which had the defence muddled when a whistle blew and nothing was done to enforce it. As for us we had to wait until 10 minutes into the second half until we made our own break through. We kept battling which shows that as a team we are beginning to work together instead of having a team of individuals. This comes from a lot more people being able to come to training and getting to games that little bit earlier. Even though we didnt get the result we deserved this week that won't stop us from trying next week. Well played everyone. (SS)

Team: George Sykes (gk), Karen Dodds, Stacey Sellman, Emma Matebalavu, Nens Corren, Roz Hornsby, Lucy Gaskin, Lou Curry, Julie Lapsley, Erica Goldsmith, Monique O'Brien, Penny Stevens, Beth Little.

Umpire: Kath Sowter

Womens 4s vs. Mitcham 1s: Won 2-1 (friendly)

Only a friendly, but a good win all the same. Thanks to our ringers from the 1s and 2s - certainly helped us out in the defence. Really can't remember much about the game, but I think sympathy goes to Ash for the whack in the face she received, and congratulations to Anna for finally conquering the left post slip that had been evading her all match! Looking forward to the real thing next week when league matches resume. (CW)

Team: Jess Sellman, Kath Sowter, Kate Silsbury, Anna Stuttard, Stacey Sellman (part...anna had to go to football), Jean Sutton, Emily Tearle, Lynne Ruddick, Liz Young, Gaby Bishop, Ash McDonald, Lynsey Bilsland, Claire Whitehead.

Scorers: Claire Whitehead, Anna Stuttard

Umpires: Penny and Vicky

Next match: Saturday 29 October vs. London Edwardians - 11.00 @ JAGS

Dragons vs. Optimists: Won 3-1

Another week, another win. The results are more regular than my Grandad after a 17-month diet of prunes and the work up play to the goals was more clinical than an episode of ER. The Dragons' style of play has become well-known in the free-world as a hybrid between hockey & pinball. Everybody passed, passed & passed again and the umpires saw the Optimists backboard death-rattle a hat-trick of times. The team shared the ball more than a bunch of communists with a bag of turnips. Worship at our altar for we truly are the second-coming of hockey. As my old mate the omelette maker used to say "the results are always better when it's well beaten".

Team: Jeremy Porter (GK), MJ, Will Nurse, Lee Snowden, Chris Richman, James Perrott, Ratty, Si Wilshire, Liz Young, Claire Whitehead, Gemma Baker, Lucy Muldoon, Lou Curry, Bettina Wolff & Pippa Haworth.

Scorers: Bettina Wolff, Chris Richman & Claire Whitehead

Umpire: Chris Richman / James Perrott

Photographer: Nick Thomson

Men's 1s vs. Fareham: Lost 1-4

Fareham is a long way to go to lose a game of hockey, of which more presently. First, though, spare a thought for any unfortunate day-trippers heading down to the South Coast to enjoy a surprisingly mild October Saturday - they must have found the entire coastline devoid of sand, such was the depth of the yellow stuff on The Henry Cort Community College hockey pitch. It would have made an excellent venue for a game of beach cricket, and sadly we may have acquitted ourselves rather better in such a contest than we did in sticking with the scheduled hockey match.

A briefer-than-usual pre-match routine failed to blow away the cobwebs of the long journey, and we started slowly. Not overflowing with individual flair, Fareham were nonetheless well-drilled with solid basics and they created a handful of early chances. An injury gave the trainers chance to make one of several appearances during the game and gave us chance to regroup. From then on, we played some better hockey. We transferred the ball across the back as well as we have done so far this season, and built through the midfield with some good passages of possession. Andy Balchin carried the ball strongly, literally pushing his way through on occasion, and coped admirably with being on the receiving end of the 'he can't pick up his teeth with broken fingers' treatment.

Despite these encouraging passages of play, however, the game was too often one of two halves for us - half-cocked when we made it into their D, and half-asleep when they counterattacked. We failed to create meaningful chances as passes went astray in the final third, and Fareham capitalized twice to score on the break and leave us trailing 2-0 at the turnaround.

Half time oranges brought back fond memories of the under 14 'B' XV on a cold Saturday morning in January, but sadly failed to bring back the previous week's form that had seen us score 3 unanswered goals in the second half and romp to victory. In fact, we found ourselves in the reverse situation and three goals in deficit as Fareham yet again attacked from deep, transferred across the top of the D and netted with a rather fortunate nutmeg.

The urgency of our situation made an already ill-tempered game increasing fractious. Early in the second half is a statistically dangerous period in any game, being very much the bell of the yellow card frequency distribution. This match was no exception, and after a series of poor tackles from both teams, the umpire seized on a bit of innocuous name-calling as an opportunity to prove how big his whistle was. Dave Hancock and his opposite number were duly sent from the pitch to think about what they'd done, though when they rejoined the fray there was no change to the scoreline.

Galvanized into action by the need for goals, TH&D began to push forward more aggressively, with John Craven making some notable probing runs down the right. This pressure finally paid off as we created our only short corner of the game. Whilst waiting in the goal to defend the corner, a Fareham player somehow managed to get himself yellow-carded by the other umpire, apparently for the low quality chat that was the hallmark of his game all afternoon. We failed to convert the corner, but the numerical advantage finally told some minutes later as Jack Robinson netted his second in two games.

As the match entered its final stages, Fareham continued to create more chances and forced a number of good saves from Chris Roberts. Finally, though, their pressure brought them further reward. The earlier culture of Craven's dribbling was replaced by the agri-culture of his tackling and from the ensuing penalty flick Fareham made the final score 4-1. As the last of the plentiful sand slipped through the umpire's metaphorical hour-glass, we were left to reflect on what might have been had we played to our strengths - anyone for beach cricket next year?

And for those who wanted a philosophical interpretation of the game...

Team: Reid, Socrates, Descartes, Zeno, Aristotle, Plato, Hume, Russell, Heidegger, Kant, Mill (JS), Sartre, Nietzsche, Gettier.

Coach: Juan Bautista Alberdi

Umpires: Hegel, Popper

Scorer and Man of the Match: Gettier

Cards: Zeno (yellow).

No Game - Mens 2s, Womens 1s, 2s, 5s & 6s

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