Newsletter 2005/06

Since 2003/04 the club has produced weekly match reports. From the start of the 2005/06 season this became a weekly newsletter, distributed during the season, containing match reports from each of the games played that weekend as well as other key information and a selection of adverts and offers.

Sun 04-Dec-05

Issue 10

The Diamonds remain the favoured suit on the team of the year table as a hat-trick from man of the match, Rob Giret, brought them another win. That's eight from nine and sees them poised on the shoulder of their league leaders. But they weren't the only team to shine last weekend. The Mens 1s and 2s had to scrabble for players but still managed to pull off highly satisfactory draws against top of the league sides. And the Tornados threw off the slough of recent weeks to trounce Teddington - there's not much solace in pink and brown these days. Other West London teams also found themselves under the THD hammer - a year ago a mere sighter of the SW19 postcode would have rattled the Women's 2s, but don't underestimate them now. A 4-0 defeat of Wimbledon, third in the table, what's in a postcode? Hitherto unbeaten Richmond had their pride pricked too as they also conceded four to the Women's 1s. Forget Go West, Get South - hockey's heading in the right direction .....

reports by: Gareth Weir, Aidan Brock, James Terrett, Mark Jones, Billy Dowie, Chris Richman, EJ Barry, Sarah Longair, Stacey Sellman, Claire Whitehead and Victoria Wright.

Men's 1s vs. Chichester: Drew 2-2

Lor' luv a duck! It was a freeze yaaahr Brad Pitts off Saturday mornin' when THD meandered sowf ter play top ov da league "scorin' goals fer fun" Chichester. Wif a squad ov Legs players makin' da selecshun policy easy fer da stand in skip, THD brought in some new recruits an' lined up wiv a yowf policy up fron' (bar Jimmy an' Fez), an OAP policy in da midfield (bar Andy an' Andres) an' a short Irish terrior policy at da back (bar Hughsey, Rab, G. An' Smudge).

Chichester started strongly an' despite da resilien' 'ard work from THD, wen' Bottle ov Glue to nil in fron' fruff Bottle ov Glue good Camilla Parker Bowls (well one, da uvver wen' fruff my bacon and eggs). We competed on da break fruff an' created a number ov chances an' shots on the sausage roll but little ter trouble da Chichester keeps. That is until AB wandered in'er da D, lost da ball, then got i' back an' Jude Lawed a sausage roll ov da season con'ender.

Bottle ov Glue-1 'alf time. Second 'alf saw mawer pressure from Chichester but as much as they 'uffed an' puffed, they could not blow down da THD fortress. Miles ov 'ard runnin' from da guys upfront, solid tacklin' an' good composure from da guys in da middle, feis'y markin' an' persisten' badgerin' fawm da guys at da back an' some outstandin' saves from da Scot between da sticks grew aaahr confidence an' i' was no less van we deserved when G. tripped over 'is stick ter deflect a short corner in da net Bottle ov Glue-Bottle ov Glue.

We snatched da SWAG an' 'eaded back 'ome (via McD's) ter a 'appy night ov Yuri Gellers an' Lemon Curds / ex-Lemon Curds / spyin' ex-Lemon Curds / trouble & strife / in laws / paintin' sessions / moriarties / pet projects / time share flat arrangemun's / Barclays Banking / MOTD etc...

Great work boys. Let's get Tom Mix mawer points dis year. . (GW)

Team: Chris Roberts, Chris Smith, Andrew Eames, Gareth Weir, Tom Hughes, Andy Balchin, Andres Labourt, Richard Banwell, James Ireson, Dave Casement and James Huntley

Scorers: Andy Balchin, Gareth Weir

MOM: Chris Roberts

Men's 2s vs. Southgate 2s: Drew 2-2

Late call ups to the 1s and absences meant we were 5 down form our usual complement on a freezing cold afternoon at DC. Nevertheless the cancellation of the Men's 3s game meant we had a full team and set about our task with gusto.

The first five minutes saw us camped in the Southgate 25 and any complacency they had about slotting another rugby score past a team in the lower half of the division was soon dispelled. Unfortunately this led to them stepping it up, spending a large part of the remainder of the half giving us a taste of our own medicine and going into the break 1-0 up courtesy of a short corner.

Some reorganisation and a few rousing words from Nursey senior at half time did the trick, although not before they had scored a clinical reverse stick shot not long after push back. Nevertheless we have shown in recent weeks that we are no push overs (quite literally, if the Southgate report of our physical 'rugby' approach to hockey is to be believed)- we got our structure back and started to press, Nursey senior's relentless pressing of the ball earning him enough time in the d to smash a shot that the keeper would have been glad not to get in the way of, 2-1. Southgate are a very strong side but we broke play down effectively and, expertly marshalled by Ferg 'the Hoff' Jagger from the back and John Nurse and Paul from the midfield, we scored a deserved equaliser, were the stronger team in the final stages and Southgate will have felt lucky to escape with a draw.

Overall a great result and testament to our strength in depth as those helping out from the 3s all played brilliantly (returning 2s players be warned). Huge thanks to Marilyn and Mark for umpiring and to the Men's 6s for their vociferous support in the second half. (AB)

Team: Wiggy, Aidan Brock, Chris Coleman, Alex Brown, Ed Stevenson, Ferg The Hoff Jagger, Joe G, Paul Harvey, Lee Snowden, Andy Potapa, Nick Jacobs, Laurent, Will Atkinson, Will Nurse and John Nurse.

Scorers: John Nurse, OG (/ Potty)

Umpires: Marilyn Walker and Mark Jones

Next match: Saturday 3rd December vs. Hampstead &Westminster 3s - away

Men's 3s vs. Teddington 3s: Match cancelled

Teddington were unable to field a side and more drastically have decided to pull out of the league. Fortunately this has moved us up to 4th in the League. Well played all. (JT)

Next match: Saturday 3rd December vs. Hampstead & Westminster 4s - 11:00 @ JAGS THD

Tornados vs. Teddington 4s: Won 4-1

"EAT THAT PORTION OF GOALS... GO ON EAT IT... WANT SOME MORE? GOOD!" For the second week running the Tornados took on the role of dinner ladies while Teddington lined up like Oliver Twists. "Please sir, can I have some more?" they asked... "How about four more?" we replied. If horses were goals then Champion the Wonder-Goal was released from his stable and promptly went about throwing itself into the opposition's goal - four times. The Teddies played as though they were on one of their legendary picnics... which was surprising as they were bolstered by their recently defunct 3s team. The effect of this influx was to make them as impotent as an action man doll. As the possession consistently fell to the Tornados and we rained pressure down upon them, David Bowie and Queen started their vocal warm-ups... As my old mate the weather forecaster used to say "There's going to be a period of sustained high pressure which will cause virtually everything in its path to be blown away." Next week we give Hampstead & Westminster a beating, then the government... and shortly afterwards the WORLD... Ha ha ha ha... (MJ)

Team: Lee Tearle (GK), MJ, Nick Thomson, Tom Alexander, Rolly Ferneaux, Dan Hopkins, Si Wilshire, Dougal Davis, Nick Harris, James Perrott, Nick Jones, Rich Fenton, Loz Mockery, Irfan Begg and Geoff Pritchard.

Scorers: Irfan Begg (2), Geoff Pritchard (2)

Coach: Si Riley

Umpire: Aidan Brock

THD Diamonds vs. Southgate Goblets (away): Won 5-2

Eight wins out of nine, and still we're only second in the League. This result, however, left the Goblets in third place, nine points adrift and dreading the hammering they'll get in the return fixture.

The Goblets' schoolkids are an extremely well-drilled outfit, with fine individual and team skills, and they showed us a thing or two in the first half. They took the lead from a short after 10 minutes or so, a lead they would have doubled soon after if their second short corner strike hadn't sunk reassuringly quietly into the net six inches above the backboard. In our determination to equalise, we then presented them with a one-on-one, which goalie Paul did well to thwart. But throughout, we were pressurising them high up the field, and they eventually cracked and let in Rob Giret to ping home a beauty........ That steadied us, and at half-time, with the scores at 1-1, it was an evenly-balanced game.

But the momentum was with the Diamonds, and it wasn't long before Simon's strike rebounded for Dom to stroke home our second. The Goblets came back, and another short saw Billy stop one with his feet, giving Paul the chance to save the resulting P-flick low to his right and reinvigorate us all with an extra dose of adrenalin. Two goals swiftly followed, not a minute apart, with Rob and Nick each finishing off devastatingly incisive moves.

At 4-1, we were feeling confident for the first time, but the Goblets were not dead yet. To their credit, they came back hard at us, maintaining their passing game. I was reminded of those glory days (from a defender's point of view!) when seeing your opponent receive the ball with his back to you meant instinctive acceleration to a point five yards beyond him - and, of course, through him. The opportunity to put him on the floor, preferably accompanied by an aerial trajectory, AND win a free hit for obstruction in the process, was just too tempting. Well, one of the Diamonds has recently begun to hanker after those days, and whilst it's splendid to see him enjoying himself, some self-control is in order. Another short saw them score from the rebound, making it 4-2.

There followed five minutes of intense pressure on us, when it could easily have gone to 4-3, but we held firm in defence, loudly berating one of our forwards for hanging around the Goblets' D and not tracking back. It was Rob Giret, bravely nursing a dead knee; so when Nick outstripped their midfield yet again, Rob was surprisingly well placed to fight off Arthur's efforts to deny him his hat-trick, forcing home our fifth to finish them off at last. We didn't even get the MOTM ballot sheets out afterwards - everyone unhesitatingly nodding in Rob's direction, although whether they all understood the question is open to debate. (BD)

Team: Paul Reid, Richard Batty, Tom Chicken, Rob Thomas, Billy Dowie, Graeme Evans, Simon Canter, Rob Giret (MOTM), Nick Hart, Dominic Peyton, Arthur Mitchell, Oliver Walton

Scorers: Rob Giret (3), Dominic, Nick

Next game: Saturday 3 December vs. Hampstead & Westminster Thirsts - 12.30 @ home

THD Royals vs.HAC Sutlers: Won 5-1

Of the three things mentioned in last week's match report, two were solved this week. Firstly, the mad goalkeeper issue: we had Jeremy this week and a calmer more placid and nice man you could never hope to meet. I fear normal service will be resumed in a couple of weeks however. Secondly giving the opposition a two goal start seems to have been remedied for this week at least with HAC giving us a four goal start. But this doesn't mean this problem has gone away. The third point was that of arriving late which does still seem to be occuring although the person who lives 40 yards from the pitch did make it onto time and proceeded to give me a dressing down using the word bugger quite a lot in the process.

Anyway to the game. This was a good win and very much needed as our season was in danger of ebbing away before Christmas. In truth we played some good stuff in parts but mainly we did what we had to do to secure the win. The hour before the game meet time did seem to work in as much as it gave us a lot of time to do a proper warm up and practice short corners which before this game we had managed to convert one out of about thirty five. So four short corner goals, although one which was a great finish from their post man who managed to divert a ball from a couple of yards outside his own post into the goal. Maybe this was due to the pressure we applied to them or maybe it was down to a lack of native ability - who knows?

So with everyone beating everyone else in this league or at least Indian Gym managing to beat the top two at home after not registering any points to that point (nothing suspicious or new there then), we have made it up to fifth - a couple of points behind fourth and still within reach of the top three. So after Blackheath away and the Christmas break we have it all to play for. Although a superhuman effort would be needed to get us promoted I really don't think it is beyond us. (CR)

Team: Jeremy Porter, Will Pendrill, Mike McKinnon, Richard Mead, Mark Annear, Andy Bond, Mike Wright, Doug Herad, James Kingdom, Ian Roberts, Ed Allen, Kim Keats, Mehraab Nazir and Chris Richman

Scorers: James Kingdon 2, Kim Keats 2, Mehraab Nazir

Umpire: Mark Jones

Next match: Saturday 10 December vs. Blackheath Heathens

Women's 1s vs. Richmond 1s: Won 4-1

This season we've ridden a rollercoaster ride of emotion hockey-wise, peaking and troughing like you wouldn't believe. The squad assembled on Saturday at the fortress confident that a good performance against a talented and consistent Richmond side (unbeaten this season, only 8 goals conceded) was more than possible if we all played with our sticks the correct way round and our brains nestling comfortably in our craniums. It didn't look like that for the first ten minutes. We gave them too much respect and they passed the ball round us easily. It was no surprise when they went 1-0 up after 8 mins.

Will gave us permission to tackle at this point, and this wonderful piece of skill together with a bit more running around and self belief, meant that not only did we feel a lot warmer, but as half time approached we were dominating play in all areas of the pitch. We finally got the break through we deserved when a well-worked penalty corner led to Martha elegantly setting up Charley for a deflection. Will asked for more of the same at the half time chat and the general consensus was to step up a gear and a win could be on the cards. Straight after the break Martha caught the Richmond defence napping and after beating 4 or so Richmond defenders, drove the ball towards the right post. EJ surprised everyone including the two numpties with the whistles by moving fairly quickly to ghost in from the right and deflect the ball high past the keeper. The umpires had to confer, as they didn't think it was possible, but eventually did award a goal. Suddenly we found ourselves 2-1 up. There followed a dodgy 10 mins but the defence stood rock firm, Pipes making glorious saves and each of Alex, Kath, Jenny and Nicky making cracking tackles when it mattered. Gemma, Faye and Chaz cancelled out the Richmond midfield and the forwards were looking dangerous - Lou was in a happy place. Martha produce some fine individual skill to take the ball from the half way line and beat everyone to crash the ball past the keeper from the top of the D, helped by smart running off the ball from Lou. And at the final whistle Alex belted in another from a penalty corner. Final score 4-1 winners - normal service resumed.

Team: Jo Malkin, Alex Crawford, Kath Sowter, Jenni Martin, Nicky Prior, Faye Billing, Gemma Baker, Charley Williams, Bettina Wolff, Lou Morgan, Martha Harvey-Jones, EJ Barry and Oz A.

Scorers: Charley, EJ, Martha and Alex

Next match: Saturday 10 December vs. Hounslow & Ealing (rearranged) - 10.00 (yikes) @ Duke's Meadow

Women's 2s vs. Wimbledon 2As: Won 4 - 0

A funny old game this. Settling back with my pipe and slippers to reflect, it certainly was a unusual afternoon on Saturday past. General consensus was that Wimbledon had relocated their pitch to the Arctic, so, in the footsteps of Scott, Shackleton et al, we polar explorers braved the bonerattling wind chill factor, sacrificed frost-bitten toes in search of a sixth unbeaten game on the trot. With that was cryogenically frozen my memory for the game (to be thawed at an unknown point in the future, when insightful knowledge of Surrey Div 1 will be of national importance), but we were pretty much playing well, and were duly rewarded with some rather inspiring goals. Credit lies with the now intricate interplay of our forwards, spearheaded by Penny (second game for us, 4 goals - yep, we're all feeling a bit inadequate) with Emma, Rosie and Harriet all working splendidly together to create a formidable front line.

Second half and 3-0 up, a couple of sketchy marking moments at the back, but generally going ok, and another goal for us. Then, a seemingly run of the mill hit out, one of those which finds itself 3 feet above ground, was miscued by an opposition youngster whose dodge threw her head into its path, some impact and she starting wailing, something like Kate Bush on crack. Honestly, in all my years, I've never heard such a piercing shriek, echoing round the pitch and not ceasing for nigh on 10 minutes. On trotted the crusading St John and his ambulance, said they couldn't do anything, but they couldn't move her, so poor girl had to lie on the iceberg of a pitch (clearly not a broken bone in sight) for the real ambulance. Word on the street is that the head was successfully glued back together.

So, the melodrama of the knights of St John meant the end of the game after 55 minutes and the second surreal turn for the day. Pessimistic hopes of the lukewarm dribble of the standard outer London club changing rooms couldn't have been further than the truth - suddenly we were in the Sanctuary in a team sauna, the perfect venue for smug contemplation of victory. Rumour has it that one member of the team was less well-groomed and cleansed for their European city-break, ahem, training day... Two more games before our girths expand to accommodate seasonal eating and drinking, and we're now 3rd in the league... who'd have thought it. (SL)

Team: George Sykes, Shorty Deverill, Kate Selway, Lucy Muldoon, Sarah Longair, Liz Young, Alex Hardy, Sabrina Tunnicliffe, Emma Kitley, Harriet Gallagher Powell, Rosie Carter, Penny Stephens (MOTM)

Much appreciated supporter, babysitter and driver: Lucy Partington

Scorers: Penny Stephens (2), Harriet Gallagher Powell, Emma Kitley

Next match: Saturday 8th October vs. London Edwardians 1s - 11.00 @ Dulwich College

Women's 3s vs. Raynes Park : Lost 2-7

After a good spell of possession in the first 10 minutes we were caught on the break by a very fast Raynes Park team who went one up. But we went on to put together some lovely moves but couldnt put anything in the back of the net and they scored twice more before the break. After half time we managed to keep them out of our D for at least 13 minutes until they struck again and again until we were able to gain one back. But the euphoria was over when they got another goal but once again we were able to sneak one past them which they reciprocated. Whilst getting a bashing it is a credit to the team that we didn't give up the fight which might have happened a few weeks ago but we have got so much more team spirit and we won't give up the fight.

Team: Dulcie (gk), Stacey Sellman, Nens Corren, Lou Curry(C), Karen Dodds, Kate Vicary, Julie Lapsley, Mo Obrien, Beth Little, lizzie, Roz Hornsby, Emma Matebalavu, Erica Goldsmith.

Scorers: Mo, Lizzie

Umpire: Chris

Next match: Saturday 3 December vs. Old Kingstonians - away @ 15.30

Women's 4s vs. Wimbledon 3s: Lost 1-3

Not really our most stunning performance, to be fair. We began the week with 16 keen players. By Saturday morning we had been reduced to 12. Wimbledon were a good side but we really shouldn't have lost to 9.5 players (nice job of tripping up their best player Rosie!). When we did actually score from a series of one-twos and a fab cross from Jena we made it look easy...for the rest of the time it seemed just too much like hard work. We were unlucky - Sophie hit the post and we messed up a load of corners. Oh well - feeling a bit dispirited now - getting a sense of deja vu. And we're playing top of the league Richmond next week. Roll on Christmas.

Team: Jess Sellman, Nikki Smithies, Rosie Le Voir, Anna Stuttard, Rona Francis, Helen Clark, Janine Nicholls, Lynne Ruddick, Isabel Drewe, Sophie Carter, Claire Whitehead and Jena Kitley.

Umpire: Steve Powell

MOTM: n/a. We were all a bit rubbish. (have now lost the motivational speak of September!!)

Scorer: Claire Whitehead - 1 (should have been more.....sorry!)

Next match: Saturday 3 December vs. Richmond - 11.30 away

Women's 5s - No match

Womens's 6s vs. Spencer 5s (friendly): Lost 0-9

A friendly game this week. On a bitterly cold day everyone eager to keep warm. The shoe was on the other foot this week as I was umpiring. What a different perspective that gave me. All I can say was everyone seemed to be frightened of the ball. Come on ladies - get involved! There was one exception when Katie S made a fantastic save stopping the ball just before the line and clearing it perfectly! Good to see Kate A back for the weekend from Uni too. Anyway there was some good passing, but in the end just beaten by a better and fitter side. It was good to get the umpiring practice and in a macabre kind of way I quite enjoyed it. I hope I was not too bad ladies. Back to the experts next week. Thanks to Mae Lynne for making up the numbers even though it should have been her umpiring debut! (VW)

Team: Ellie Johnston, Katie Stone, Jess Beach, Kate Straker, Gigi Ho, Lucy Gilchrist, Maurissa Allan, Isla McGregor, Shona Welch, Kate Andersen and Mae Lynne McDougall.

MOTM: Gigi Ho, Maurissa Allan, Katie Stone.

Scorers: Would love to write something here but alas .............

Umpire: Victoria Wright

Next match: Saturday 3 December vs UCL Academicals 1s - 14.30 @ Old Cranleighans

THD Dragons vs. Old Mid-Whitgiftians: Won 5-3

Like my old mates The Beatles used to say (to the tune of 'Yesterday')...

"Sunday, all our stick skills seemed so far away

Now it looks as though they're here to stay

Oh, we believe in Sunday.

Suddenly, we're still twice as drunk as we hoped to be,

There's a shadow hanging over me.

Oh, that attacker came suddenly.

Why'd he have a go I don't know he wouldn't say.

We did nothing wrong, we're too strong for Sunday.

Sunday, hockey's such an easy game to play.

We're going to slot one more away.

Oh, we kick ass on Sunday.

Why we always win, I don't know I couldn't say.

We do nothing wrong, we're so strong on Sunday.

Sunday, we just blew the oppo away

Weeping, they've just run away.

Our Hockey rocks on Sunday.

Mm mm mm mm mm mm mm". (MJ)

Team: Jeremy Porter (GK), MJ, JT, Lee Snowden, Chris Coleman, Nick Hart, Chris Richman, Mike Wright, Anna Stuttard, Kate Vicary, Vicky Wright and Emma Gilchrist.

Scorers: Chris Richman (2), Chris Coleman, Mike Wright and Lee Snowden

Umpire: Simon Riley

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