Newsletter 2005/06

Since 2003/04 the club has produced weekly match reports. From the start of the 2005/06 season this became a weekly newsletter, distributed during the season, containing match reports from each of the games played that weekend as well as other key information and a selection of adverts and offers.

Sat 21-Jan-06

Issue 13

The first weekend of the New Year is never the easiest time to resume a hockey season, but the Tornados ensured that THD got points on the board with a whirlwind victory against Wimbledon. Dougal Davis led the charge and the shouting, celebrating his goal with a 70 yard sprint and roar worthy of a man of the match award in itself. Much of the rest of the action was sedentary in comparison, though the Men's 2s got a decent draw and some others ran around a bit and put the New Year's hangovers finally to bed. Reports, as ever, below. Happy New Year one and all.

reports by: Andy Potapa, James Terrett, Simon Riley, Graeme Evans, Gemma Baker, Sarah Longair, Vicky Wright, Chris Smith and Lucy Partington.

Men's 1s - No game

Men's 2s vs. Beckenham & Bromley: Drew 1-1

"Capt. Stuart Kinder: Doesn't give me anything. But along with these other results, it gives YOU just about the most twisted, anti-social bunch of psychopathic deformities I have ever run into! And the worst, the most dangerous of the bunch, is Maggott. You've got one religious maniac, one malignant dwarf, two near-idiots... and the rest I don't even wanna think about!

Major John Reisman: Well, I can't think of a better way to fight a war."

The Game: B&B took the push back and began well looking organised and confident, where as we struggled with our basics and were floundering on cold January morning, this was compounded when we lost Graeme Fotherington within the first 10 minutes, opening up an old wound. Shortly afterwards a THD attack broke down and the B&B midfield were quick to capitalise and the ensuing counter attack lead to a well-taken goal. Our heads briefly dropped but we were soon back on track with John Nurse and Banners battling hard in the midfield. Before the HT whistle had blown we had create several good chances but went into HT 1 - 0 down and down to 10 men owing to Lee "chopper" Snowden who executed a trade mark tackle that poleaxed a B&B player, the umpire not hesitating to produce the yellow card. The second half typified why we have become a tough outfit to beat. We were strong in the tackle, organised, determined and we eradicated many of the unforced errors that had hindered our first half performance. However, we weren't taking our chances and the clock was running down. B&B were clinging to their slender lead but THD never gave up and with 5 minutes left we were awarded a penalty corner for a series of bad tackles in the B&B 25. Silence descended the DC pitch and a storm gathered at the top of the D, in the form of John Nurse (aka Maggot), a wayward injection gave the ball directly to JN, he rounded the first runner, steadied himself and slung a thunderbolt into the top left corner. Goal. The game ended 1 -1, a thoroughly deserved point. Next game against the unbeaten B&B 2nd team, so more heroics required. (AP)

Dirty Dozen Castlist: Lee Marvin/Major John Reisman (Aidan Brock); Ernest Borgnine/Maj Gen Worden (Ferg Jagger); Charles Bronson/Joseph T Wladislaw (Lee Snowden); Jim Brown/Robert T Jefferson (Mark Pulford); John Cassavetes/Victor R Franko (Chris Coleman); Richard Jaeckel/Sgt Clyde Bowren (Justin Collins); George Kennedy/Maj Max Armbruster (Brown); Trin Lopez/Pedro Jiminez (Ferron); Ralph Meeker/Capt Stuart Kinder (Graeme Fotheringham); Robert Ryan/Col Everett Dasher Breed (Griffiths); Telly Savalas/Archer J Maggott (John Nurse); Donald Sutherland/Vernon L Pinkley (Richard Banwell); Clint Walker/Samson Posey (Andy Potapa).

Men's 3s vs. Bromley & Beckenham 3s: Lost 2-6

In a weekend where the mighty Leicester City administered an awesome giant killing, the 3s faced top of the league B&B and unfortunately didn't. A tough game, in which B&B's superior fitness and sharpness showed through, with much of the team feeling the effects of sustained body abuse through the Christmas period. The game turned on a period of 15 minutes in the first half when B&B scored 4 goals without reply and we looked a little lost, being pulled all over the pitch with myself in particular playing like the unfit tub of lard I have become. Despite the goals, we were still creating chances with Jon Jackson and Graeme Lyness constantly a threat, and we got to the break thinking we could get something out of the match. Unlike Leicester's second half demolition at the Walkers Stadium, disaster struck straight after the break, when sloppy passing from ourselves led to a remarkable B&B finish from an impossible angle. However, this only helped to spur us on, as first Mike Killen and then Jon Jackson scored well worked goals (much like Elvis Hammond's and Stephen Hughes'), and as B&B eventually tired and the game became more open, we created more chances but unlike Mark De Vries' injury time winner against Spurs, we failed fill our boots. I am joining Fat Fighters.

Team: Jeremy Porter, Rob Glavin, Robby Leyton, Kieron Norris, Phil Webb, Wes Cole, Will Atkinson, Graeme Lyness, James Terrett, Mike Killen, David Fogden, Jon Jackson.

Umpire: Bruce Haines

Scorers: Mike Killen, Jon Jackson

Tornados vs. Wimbledon: Won 3-1

Think of Wimbledon and you can picture the leafy green courts at SW19, the Common and for the more youthfully challenged amongst us, Uncle Bulgaria, Madame Cholet, Orinoco and Tobermory. You might also think of a once-mighty football team, now sadly relocated to a town of roundabouts, and a once-mighty hockey team, sweeping all before them in the 2004/5 season.

When you're at the top, there's only one way to go and that's down. And down they went on Saturday, 3-1 to the mighty mens 4th XI, the Tornados, the irresistible force and immovable object combined. 5 wins on the bounce, the best defensive record in the league and an awesome attack now averaging almost 3 goals per game.

Ably assisted by Frodo, the Grinch and Leeroy, Pharaoh of Dulwich, all good things come to those who wait and like the wonderful red double-deckers along came 3 in a row - second half goals for Dougal, Dan the Dentist and Nick J. As my mate Dougal said to everyone as he sprinted back up the pitch after scoring.... "HAVE IT!!!!"

We were great. They were not. 'Nuff said.

Team: Aidan Brock(GK), Roly Furneaux, Richard Fenton, Nick Thomson, Si Wilshire, Dan Hopkins, Dougal Davis, Nick Harris, Nick Jones, Irfan Begg, Tom Alexander, Leeroy Snowden, Chris Richman

Umpire: Simon Riley

MOTM: Dougal Davis

DOTD: Leeroy "What, I'm man of the match??" Snowden, Roly "I'd get lost in my own front room" Furneaux Shirt of the day: for the 12th week in succession - Richard Fenton

THD Diamonds vs. Reading Rascals: Lost 3-5

As if a post-Christmas trip to Reading was not bad enough, THD found themselves up against kids whose idea of bingeing over the festive period probably amounted to little more than an extra can of coke or two. With several key players out through injury, a repeat of October's 3-2 win was always going to be a tall order, but Reading certainly got the rub of the green to swing the game their way. THD were still in the process of burning off the festive calories when Reading got their first slice of luck with a short-corner strike that deflected past keeper Paul Reid. Oliver Walton conjured up some trickery in a tight spot to equalise, but indecision at the other end then allowed Reading to restore their lead, even though THD had played the better attacking hockey in the first half. Matters went pear-shaped after the break, with an own goal and another short-corner goal before THD finally came to life with a strike from Simon Canter and a well-executed short-corner from Warren Holme - just one of two shorts awarded to THD in the game. A few more and the result may have different, but THD now find themselves looking over their shoulders in order to preserve their second spot in the League. (GE)

Team: Paul Reid (GK), Richard Batty, Gus Barnard, Graeme Evans, Will Morgan, Simon Canter, Nick Hart, Dominic Peyton, Tim Harris, Ollie Walton, Arthur Mitchell, Warren Holme Scorers: Ollie, Simon, Warren.

Umpire: Billy Dowie

Royals - No game

Women's South Indoor League - finished 3rd

Qualifying pool - 17 December:

vs. Purley: Won 4-2

vs. Southampton: Won 2-1

vs. Horsham: Lost 3-4

vs. Richmond: Won 6-4

Finals night - 21 December

vs. Maidenhead: Drew 1-1

vs. Southgate: Drew 2-2

vs. Horsham: Drew 1-1

In the qualifying pool on the Saturday, THD started the day by playing some great team hockey to beat local rivals Purley and a hard pressing Southampton side with all goals coming from open play. After losing to Horsham due to conceding 3 goals in 5 minutes we went into the last game knowing that we had to beat Richmond to qualify for finals night. A tight first half saw us 2-1 up at the break. A good period saw us extend the lead to 5-2 before Richmond began their onslaught. A goal from a corner, Kath went off injured after stopping a shot with her left cheek, a penalty miss, then another goal making it 5-4. With nerves on edge we broke out and Harriet scored sealing the win for us. Finals night saw a rather disappointing performance with all of our games being drawn. This meant that we finished 3rd in the South but missed out on National league playoffs.

Team: Jo Malkin, Kath Sowter, Clare Byrne, Bettina Wolff, Gemma Baker, Penny Stephens, Rosie Carter, Harriet Gallagher-Powell.

Coach: Will Nurse

Manager: Peter Malkin

Scorers: Penny 6, Gemma 4, Harriet 4, Kath 3, Bettina 1.

Women's 1s - No proper game....

...but a spot of mixed hockey with the men, followed by heavy drinking, good food, some dancing and speaking russian at a trendy underground venue in Knightsbridge. I remember very little, our esteemed editor may remember slightly more being the sober one.....(GB)

Girls that played: Pipes, Kath, Alex, Hannah, Gem, EJ, B, Martha, Penny and Kate S

Umpire: Charley

Girls that partied: EJ (and her Russian hat), B, Hannah, Gem and Charley

Women's 2s vs. Ashford (Kent): Won 2-0

Following the pre-christmas cancellations, scepticism about the likelihood of play was rife amongst the team, especially with the BBC scaremongering weather warnings that in general suggest we should never leave our front doors in case of a flash flood. The blizzard on the M20 sparked a potential mutiny in one car, who questioned the omniscient captain's decision to carry on driving. She said, like Jon Bon Jovi, keep the faith, and thus we arrived at a chilly but playable pitch in Ashford. From then on, it was a day of celebration - hockey of the highest quality against a side who really should have beaten us. But the undampenable 2s spirit took advantage of their hapless performance and capitalised on our superior enthusiasm (even from flu sufferer Emma) and ability to play as a team. Nothing could express this better than the two goals, both from short corners (not normally an area of success), where good communication and sharp passing within the D twice produced the resounding tonk on the backboard. Kate's goal topped off a towering performance at centre midfield (at least 3 hours of Gordon's advice on the subject paid dividends) and a great way to celebrate her 30 something birthday.

All would be well if this were a league game. But no, the three teams above us in the league are our opponents in the next 3 weeks. More league-leader-toppling ahead inshallah...

This week's team: George Sykes(GK), Lucy Partington, Blumes, Lucy Muldoon, Shorty, Kate Selway, Longbeard, Liz Young, Penny Stephens, Emma Kitley, Harriet Gallagher-Powell

Scorers and joint players of the match: Kato, Liz

Women's 3s: No game

Women's 4s: No game

Women's 5s: No game

Women's 6s v Croydon MO 3s: Drew 1-1

With new sticks and kit, we braved the cold weather. We started off well with good passing and marking. A temporary lapse in concentration in defence saw us go 1-0 down at half time which was not deserved. We battled on but just could not put it in the goal. Most work was done this week by Gigi in a professional capacity as well as playing (Maurissa and Pippa). With Maurissa off injured nursing a swollen jaw ("will it be gone by Friday") we rearranged the midfield only to see Pippa then get injured. However our sub was off getting ice pops and arnica with Maurissa so Pippa gallantly played on. The defence, particularly Alice, Jo and Kate cleared some crucial balls from the line. We dragged Maurissa back on for the last ten minutes, after constant pleading. It was great - angered by the injury she then came on to score the equalising goal to give us a well deserved draw. Well played everyone.

Team: Alice Smith (GK), Kate Straker, Jo Hillyer, Jess Beach, Clare Montagu, Mae Lynne McDougall, Pippa Haworth, Maurissa Allan, Shona Welch, Gigi Ho, Isla McGregor, Victoria Wright, Katie Stone.

Scorer: Maurissa Allan

MOTM: Jo Hillyer/Kate Straker

Umpire: Ian Wright

THD Dragons vs. London Edwardians: Drew 3-3

OH....MY....GOD....Could it get any colder! Mixed hockey certainly did not live up to the glossy brochure handed out to the debutants prior to christmas. Hockey was never meant to be played in sub zero temperatures, with the rain just adding to the pain of our already frozen bodies. Suprisingly the Dragons produced twelve players an umpire and a spectator, and at times some sparkling team hockey emerged, with the Dragons dominating in every sense of the word, except the final outcome!

The only problem was scoring...no one could do it, then up popped South African Rob to fire home his 15th attempt at goal. Almost immeadiately london edwardians replied in their first attack and a quite splendid deflection past Jeremy. It seemed the Edwardians forgot to read the brochure and the part where you were supposed to pass to girls in mixed hockey.

The Dragons, stunned, were then shocked into playing properly and took a 3-1 lead through goals from another debutant South African Saul whose delight at scoring was only heard at the nearby dogs home. And a thunderous short corner strike by EJ left the Edwardians stunned into disbelief. Then we suddenly remembered who we were and surrended the lead by giving away 2 soft goals. Man of the Match was finally won by Chris Coleman, who was everywhere defence attack and midfield, a closely run second was the only spectator, the Wardrobe........ (CS)

........and finally : The "thanks for coming" award was a landslide victory for Chris "bodycheck" Smith who threw caution to the winds and himself into every tackle on the pitch.........and his jacket in the fire in the pub. This man knows no half measures. January's a chilly month for hockey - particularly if you don't have a coat to wear.......... (LP)

Scorers: Rob Heath, Saul Kornik, EJD Barry

Team: Jeremy Porter, Lucy Partington, EJ Barry, Kate Vicary, Lou Curry, Lucy Muldoon, Kath Sowter, Chris Coleman, Chris Smith, Lee Snowden, Rob Heath, Saul Kornik

Umpire: Si Riley

Spectator: Sam 'Wardrobe' Hiley

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