Fri 26-Mar-10
Issue 22
Match Reports
Not one of the best finishes to a season from THD. Only two teams won games and all the others lost!
It was the end of season for the Women’s 2s, 4s 5s and 6s. For the Men’s sides, the 2s, Tornados and Diamonds.
Not a great week, but many of the teams have fixtures remaining. Hopefully, they’ll do well!
Ramana Thirumoorthy - Editor
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This weeks match reports from the THD Teams in action.
Reports by: Jo Lyes, Charlie Krasun, Billy Dowie, Mark Annear, Ramana Thirumoorthy, Annabel Owen, Traffs, Alanna McIntosh
Mens Section
Mens 1s vs. Maidstone: Lost 1-6
Don't expect a Shakespeare or Charles Dickens of a match report this week, because it’s just not needed. We went into the Maidstone game with still the slightest possibility of staying up by ourselves.
The game started well with both teams having the ball around the back; transfers & all that sh*t. We conceded early. This was the first point in the game where we had to now step up and out of are comfort zone to produce a goal. This was done by me (Joe Lyes, #7): after fantastic build up down the right by simon created space for me to beat 2 players in the D and then put it through the GK’s legs.
1-1 and the game was for the taking, however, I really believe that at this point only a handful of players wanted it. Sounds negative but there were a fair few players in the THD team that didn't step up but thought they could just walk through the motions. As soon as they scored [their second] to make it 2-1 we had lost the game because of a few numbers in our own team. They were ******* **** and we lost to them. A ******* disgrace for all those hours we put in on the training ground.
So, enough on last week’s game. It means nothing now. From training [this week], we started to press in pairs or as a team. If we take this into Saturday’s match it will really put [Banbury] under some pressure. For me, it’s a must win game. (JL)
MOM: Simon - for a great game down the right wing.
TFC: Joe Lyes – for services to fake tan.
Team: Piggy, Smudge, Hoppo, Bungle, Browny, Tom, Joe W, Joe L, Freshy, Simon, Bino, Rob, Gavin, Andy, Butty.
Next match: Banbury, home – a chance to salvage some pride from what has been a very disappointing season.
Mens 2s vs. Wimbledon 3: Lost 0-1
The 2s lost the final game of their season in a closely fought single goal game against Wimbledon's 3s putting them in 7th in the league at the close of play. Whilst this was interesting, more interesting Wimbledon trivia is that During World War II the grounds of Wimbledon were used by fire and ambulance services, the Home Guard -(Dad's Army to youngsters) and as a decontamination unit. In October 1940 the Germans hit Centre Court with 5 big bombs, resulting in the loss of 1,200 seats.
MoM: Robby Layton
TFC: Matt Groom / Guy Huckvale
Next match: End of season!
Mens 3s vs. St Albans Senators: Lost 1-3
No match report.
Next match: Away vs. Hampstead & Westminster 4s
Tornados vs. Diamonds: Won 3-0
We won fairly easily, to be honest. All three goals from short corners, a lot of pressure and we restricted them to a few half chances. You can see their opinion below...
Roll on the play-offs.
Scorers: Will, Pully (2)
Team: Bailey, Charlie, Pully, Tom, Wilsh, Aido, Rob, MJ, Fish, Little Fish, Will, Zesh, JC, Bristles.
Next match: Div 5 League Cup Play-Off Semi Final, 17th April.
Diamonds vs. Tornados: Lost 0-3
Final league game of the season. Having already whittled out enough points to avoid relegation, we could relax and concentrate on finishing on a high… except we didn’t, and that honour will have to wait until our friendly in three weeks time.
The Tornados had obviously had enough of us taking points off them. They had more of the possession and regularly put us under pressure in our 25, but our defence did a sterling job keeping them at bay. Having conceded both goals from shorts in the earlier fixture, we knew what the Tornados main scoring strength is – knowing does not necessarily mean dealing with, however, and we conceded five shorts, three of which they scored from.
Our opportunities came mainly on the break, from Joe's pace and Simon's running from midfield, but the clinical accuracy we displayed at Richmond two weeks ago was absent here. We also had three shorts, none of which we converted.
So, we finished eighth of 11 in the division, with 18 points from 20 games – pretty much the same as last year. (BD)
Squad: James Fuller, Tom Illingworth, Ben Salsbury, Olly Walton, Trem Parvin, Graeme Evans, Sam Younger, Robert Patrick, Stephen Ireton, Nick Allen, Simon Canter, Marc Antoine, Irfan Begg, Joe Del-Greco
Umpires: Tim Sylvester & Chris Coleman
Next match: End of season!
Royals vs. PHC Chiswick 5s: Lost 0-1
Softly stole the rain
Blue-shirted masses, eager for the points, came to sodden Dulwich;
Incessant sweeps of water
Led by mouthy Saffer, never seen before: blue-shirted masses came certain of the points;
Sheet after sheet of rain
Yellow-shirted man, acknowledging worth of mouthy Saffer: thinks he could do no wrong;
Creeping, seeping, incessant torrent
“Corner!” blew the yellow-shirted man, ignoring his compatriot;
Drip to follow drip, and drip again
Held out the worthy red shirts: holding, firm, committed;
Dank rose the endless deluge
Walked on the worthy red shirts, fearlessly foraging forward;
Onward swept the sweeping rain
Slipped up a worthy red shirt, only briefly lapsing;
Never-ending water
Fraught rose the worthy red shirts, wet with perspiration;
Endless drifting rain
Then won the worthy red shirts, the chance for absolution;
Never stopped the flood
But spoke the yellow-shirted men, and chance dissolved in water;
Swept on the rain
Yet ran on the worthy red shirts, but chance fell down in flames.
Drowned out the rain (MA)
Squad: J.S. Bayliss (c), A.P. Bond, S. Butcher, O.J. Carruthers, R.G. Fleck, O. Furlong, N. Harris, T.E. Harris, N.K. Howick, O. Norris, J. Perrott, B.J. Slater, T.G.E. Smith, E.J.W. Taylor Jones, A.M. Woods, M.O.P. Annear (16)
Scorers: Just the one of theirs, though Westlife did his best to provide...!
MOTM: Keith (for an excellent game in defence), Tim Smith (for an excellent game in defence), Furlong (for a tenacious game in midfield), JP (for a sound game in midfield), Ash (for some incisive work on the right, and for happening to have played about ten minutes at right back), Steve Butcher (for an excellent game in defence), your correspondent (for happening to have played all of 25 seconds in defence when the vote for “the defence” came out), and Tim Harris (for having the name “Tim”) all won votes. But the honourable mention went to Westlife (for an excellent display up the left, from defence), and the title to Robbie (on his final appearance for the Royals as a schoolkid, and for an excellent display at right back)
Special moment of the day: Votes for your correspondent (not being clear about how many Steves were voted for, and confusion over substitutions), the skipper (playing up front and not scoring, and attempting to influence the vote by saying that more than one Steve was involved in the afternoon’s proceedings), Westlife (playing the ball in for their goal), Ken (revealing his ballot and being unable to read his own handwriting), Robbie (not being in position to prevent their goal), Carruthers (playing up front and not scoring), Nozza (playing up front and not scoring), Furlong (playing in an attacking position and not scoring), Ash (playing in an attacking position and not scoring), Tim Harris (playing up front and not scoring), Charles Norris (unfair order to tidy a certain person’s room, and failure to award penalty flick) and Adam Bond (playing up front and not scoring, and in doing so failing to execute a golden goal-scoring opportunity on the far post). Had it not been for Who-is-Steve-Walsh (who failed to disclose why he didn’t turn up again), Ben Slater would have won this award due to a long stint up front in which he failed to score, revealing his vote, failing to note that there were more than two Tims on the pitch, and railing against the system..
Umpires: Many thanks to Charles Norris, but theirs was a bit shoddy
Next match: Home vs. Indian Gymkhana, 1230hrs, JAGS
Saracens vs. Indian Gymkhana 4s: Lost 1-9
A relatively inexperienced Saracens side turned up at Osterley not knowing what to expect. The opposition were a side that had played together over the years, and were well-drilled in their few but effective tactics.
We went down 1-0 fairly quickly. Nick then produced a series of good plays, with help from Deepak tearing down their left wing. We got a goal back from Nick, and then proceeded to have a series of chances in front of goal but to no avail.
Their next eight goals were all similar stuff. They had only two tactics. One was the standard Route 1 dribble up the middle of the pitch. Another was to get a short corner, where they used their good stopping and accurate hitting to seal the game. We could not deal with their stick skills, and failed to use our superior fitness against them.
We learnt many lessons from this. Let’s hope we remember this for 10 April, when they come to Fortress DC for the last game of the season. (RT)
Squad: Melvin (GK), Tim, Michael, Mark, Oli Clark, Duncan, Alastair, Neil, Ben Deepak, Nick Weller, Ian Townsend (c), Ramana Thirumoorthy, Colin Wilkie-Jones
Scorers: Nick W
MOTM: Nick W (scoring the goal and having a valiant attempt at a reverse stick sweep)
TFC: The oppo & their umpire
Umpires: Ramana Thirumoorthy, Duncan Carmichael and “Franco” (theirs)
Next match: Away vs. Hampstead & Westminster Thirsts
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Womens Section
Womens 1s vs. Maidenhead: Lost 0-3
It was quite a depleted 1s’ team playing on Saturday night, but those that could make it arrived in a much more timely fashion than they had for any training session this season; who would have thought we are more keen to drink than we are to play hockey.
We were nearly 1-0 down before the game even started due to a lack of concentration in midfield – Annabel left her shoes in a taxi, but some great supportive play from Jen meant the situation was salvaged; go the left!
An enthusiastic warm up put us in a great position from the start and helped our newest player Kate (Piggy’s sister) get nicely settled into the game.
Jen had an early chance to score, but failed to convert with her unpopular choice of raffle prize. EJ, in true captain’s form, was determined to make up for this, and even after an initial set back (when she couldn’t convince Timmy to be her prize), returned with Freshy, giving us an exciting 1-0 lead.
Then Rebecca unexpectedly found a £20 note, which was quickly transformed into £30 by some impressive team work from Kath. Kath played a fantastic square ball to Freshy, who returned with a bottle of pink fizz… back of the net.
Feeling confident with our 2-0 lead, things began to hot up. The field opened up and our creative footwork left the opposition completely baffled. Bettina ‘Bambi’ Wolff was given a rough ride by her opponent the dance floor, but she definitely came out on top. Jen continued to put in a strong performance, but still hadn’t scored by the time the final whistle went, despite the ground work she put in with one of our coaches.
Our newest member showed great potential, scoring more than once in a great partnership up front with Freshy. It wasn’t a perfect game for Kate however as she scored an own goal early in the second half and there have been rumours of hat trick avoidance.
True to form Alex turned up late (5 hours must be a new record), but this did not affect her performance, which was as strong and animated as ever. And we cannot forget our coach Will Nurse, who actually managed to stay away for the entire evening – fatherhood is obviously good for him! (AO)
Squad: Rebecca, EJ, Annabel, Bettina, Kate, Jen, Kath and Alex
MOTM: Kate for a great rookie performance
TFC: Too many to choose from!
Next match: Home vs. Guildford 1s, 1200hrs, Dulwich College
Womens 2s vs. Richmond 2s: Won 3-2
We did it, we won, we avoided relegation. Quite possibly the best game of hockey the 2’s have played all season individually and as a team. Every single person was quite outstanding. Even Rachel and Will on the side line were at their best with some awesome coaching.
No point dwelling on hockey as that is dull – more importantly we had a very enjoyable evening at the annual end of season dinner.
We did well in the raffle as Jo brought home a glass that filled a yard of liquid. Obviously I made Biba down a yard of cider from it straight away, then thinking I could do better followed up a go and well was terrible – we all know how that ended. Rach was also very pleased with her book about military helicopters; thanks to whoever kindly donated that. It has hopefully gone to a more appreciative home with Tash’s nephew.
Lots of dancing and good times carried on into the evening. No gossip from the 2’s I think – unless anyone as anything to offer. Enjoy the summer, well done and HUGE Thanks to all team committee members. (LM)
Team: Olivia, Lucy, Kato, Kath (thanks again for playing), Ellie, Sarah B, Sarah C, Biba, Jo, Tash and Helen
Umpire: Lou (FANTASTIC)
MOM: Muldoon
Scorers: Jo and Tash
Next match: Next season
Next match: End of season!
Womens 3s vs. Epsom 3s: Lost 2-3
We dominated the first half; slick, dynamic movements and sharp passing created 2 beautiful goals from Alanna & Suzie (yes – I’m claiming the first touch) and then a screamer from Georgie. Then due to our 11 players becoming tired, we started to fall apart. 2 billion saves were made by SuperEl – not to mention the flick that was charged away but we sadly ended up losing 3-2 after a few on-pitch scuffles. Some truly incredible timekeeping by the umps; 8, yes, count them - 8 extra minutes on the second half… almost as if they were waiting to just give a short for anything they could (“deliberately breaking down play in the 25(?)”) and award a goal!
Both Epsom and Ewell have Saxon names: Ewell takes its name from the spring in the centre of the village and Epsom, or Ebbisham, is the enclosure of Ebbi. A Saxon cemetery in The Grove in Ewell was excavated in the 1930s.
Horse racing on Epsom Downs began during the spa period, but it was not until the Oaks was first run in 1789 and the Derby the following year that it took on something like its present form. The first grandstand was built in 1830 and the present complex of three stands in 1927 and 1995.
The University for the Creative Arts has one of its five campuses in Epsom. Laine Theatre Arts, an independent performing arts college, is based in the town. Students have included Victoria Beckham. (AM)
Squad: SuperEl, Stutts, Snellers, McLaren, Toshi, Georgie, Errol, Kate, Suzie, Emma B, Parker
Scorers: Alanna +Suzie, Georgie
MOTM: Parker.
TFC: Errol
Umpires: Rubbish
Next match: Away vs. Old Cranleighans 1s
Womens 4s vs. Kenley SP 1s: Lost 2-7
No match report.
Next match: End of season!
Womens 5s vs. Wanderers 6s: Lost 1-6
No match report.
Next match: End of season!
Womens 6s vs. Cheam 4s: Lost 1-4
No match report.
Next match: End of season!
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Mixed Section
Dragons vs. London Edwardians Mixed: Match cancelled.
Next match: HA Plate, Away vs. Epsom Mixed
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